March has some significance for me. The first of the month marked the three year anniversary of my quitting chocolate cold turkey.
I have not had a single drop of chocolate in three years. I didn’t set out to go this long. In 2018 I had a problem. I was eating chocolate even when I didn’t want to. Essentially I was addicted to it.
So toward the end of February I decided to try to go the whole of March without it. I moved the chocolates we did have up to higher shelves so I would have to work to get them.
It was rough. I took it one day at a time and had to deal with hours of my brain screaming at me that it needed the endorphins. But I made it through March.
So I decided to try and go without In April too.
I continued like this one month after the other. No long term goal in mind, just a personal challenge to see how long I could go.
I passed a year and then two years and now three.
Honestly by seven months or so it was way easier. I know I was grateful when I got sick that year and lost the ability to eat dairy for having already given up chocolate. It made it easier to deal with the new food restrictions.
At about one year of not having chocolate it rarely bothered me anymore. I actually made an effort then to reduce my sugar intake. I didn’t worry about my meals so much but I tried to keep my excess sugar under a certain number. Things like dessert and snacks.
Having already given up the problem food it worked remarkably easy. I know some people have to suddenly cut all their sugar down significantly because of things like diabetes. And I know it is a thing in my family medical history. So that was part of the reason I wanted to reduce my sugar. But I was lucky I was able to just reduce in areas to build better habits since I still had no signs of diabetes.
I haven’t kept track of the sugar as well since then, but the chocolate is rather easy at this point. I do occasionally have dreams of eating chocolate and then realizing what I have done. But I wake up and realize it was just a dream.
I know there are things I still have to deal with. I used chocolate as a way to alter my mood and manage some of my dysthymia symptoms. I need to deal with some of those issues. But that is a long process and for now I can celebrate my small wins.
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